Heart purification

Out of the reasons, I feel empty. It is just like, there is something lacking. And, the weirdest is I haven't shed any tears out since three months ago (?). Not a few drops of salty water from my eyes. I am afraid. Is my heart sealed? You know, a person with a sick heart will never react to the needs of other people. He does not care if his brothers and sisters are afflicted by hardship. The thing that he really care is only about himself. Ah...... Thinking about it, really gives me goosebumps.......

Remembering on what my father always said in his tazkirah, “The heart will be subjected to trial after trial, and there will appear a black stain on any heart that is affected, which will spread until the heart is completely black and sealed, as it were, so that it will not recognize any good deed or denounce any evil, except whatever suits its own desires.” (Reported by Muslim).

Oh forget to mention, I am at home now. Since I am on medication, a lot of changes had to be done on my original plans ie my practical placement and whatever (I 'll update this one in the separate entry. Later). Well, being at home at the moment, so no excuse not to follow the parents rules. Mom used to force me to accompany her to the mosque and I went when I could (when I feel like I want to go. hihi). Plus, looking back at everything that had happened, I think I have to find ways to overcome it.

 And it happened that the particular topic at the class that I had attended was regarding our attitudes during the pain and suffering happened. After thoroughly addressing the introduction of the dimension of the Kitab Penawar Bagi Hati, which he explained that Tasawwuf is the path to self-purification (membersih segala anggota zahir). But, although it focuses on the inner feelings, the other parts of the body also have to be responsible too.

Seven parts of the body that are clashed their upright and evilness:

1. Eyes

2. Nose

3. Mouth

4. Ears

5. Pubic area (Faraj)

6. Stomach

7. Hands & legs

Interesting question that being asked by the ustaz, why does we always go back to Allah when it is already late ? When there is something happened, we will seek for physical excuse, this is because of this, because of that. Yet, we actually know everything that happened is from Allah. Why we are so late to see Allah in everything........ The ustaz even said, to show He is more powerful than you, Allah sends some weird event to test you (The translation of Al-Kahfi: Story of ashabul kahfi), to see how we cope with it. To see if we will turn towards the straight path or away from it.

I was slapped by the teacher's words. Mann, this is me. When I was diagnosed with the rare disease, I am influenced by the people around me, a lot of things crossed in my mind. Because of continuous fever, stress, & even over-striving for excellence (People see me as the perfectionist. Working hard all the way. hua). I never think of Allah at first place. Ya Allah so horrible of me to think that way. It was then that I started truly understanding the ways of Allah, how everything that happens has a purpose (It doesn't matter I know or not what the reason is)..... and that I am supposed to learn from that.......

Reclaiming myself

"What are you going to do this Ramadhan?"

"Bring myself closer to Him, Insya Allah" 

"Aww, bring me to Him tooooooo!" 

*Vomit a bucket*

Picture: During "Majlis Solat Hajat Perdana in Machang"

On the serious note, Alhamdulillah Ramadhan is approaching, again! Did anyone noticed that time is moving slightly faster now ? Or, is it only my illusions ? After all, it is so frightening T__T This time, last year I was in the final semester of my diploma years in Machang. It was a very hectic semester, I didn't manage to finish even half of my Quran. ......And, I am very regret for not doing so. As for this year, I 'll be having my first degree final examination starting from next week. Six papers guys, six papers :( & to make it more worst, they are all in Ramadhan. These few days, my mind is keep thinking on how can I get the most out of this holy month whilst dealing with my final examinations. I want to win both.......

We are all not so little anymore. The basic declaration of "I would not get to eat or drink from dawn to dusk for the entire month" is not reliable anymore. There is soooo much more about this month. What it means, what the blessings are like, and how heaven opens up its doors to us.... How can you guys are not excited about all these matters ? 

I have always think that Ramadhan should be fun. Through fasting, we help to increase our mental efficiency and can spend more time applying ourselves to helping those around us. Well, being generous is definitely an Islamic merit, but being generous in Ramadhan is even more highly rewarded guys! Sooooo basically, Ramadhan is not only about the food fiesta! Hehe. The most important, it gives us another opportunity to boost our spiritual. Basically, we are always unaware of our sins that we do everyday. Thus, this is the right time for us to start cleansing our hearts and seek for Allah's forgiveness in order to embrace this holy month. 

This year, I am not going the same mistake as last year anymore. I am not saying I failed badly during the last Ramadhan (Obviously, who want to grade themselves as failure?). It is like.. by the time I finally manage to adapt with the tight schedule, I realize it is the time to bid farewell. It was so disappointing. Soooooo, I want to do better this year! You know, I read a lot of articles regarding the preparations to celebrate Ramadhan on internet and books just to make sure that I have basic knowledge on what I should really do this month. Hehe.

Examination mode is still on. But, we always have to keep in mind that in the time of competing for our survival on this materialistic world, the race for paradise should never be forgotten. I tell you earlier, I want to win both. Of course, it takes a little effort a lot of hard works to get there. But, insya Allah with Allah's help, I am going to make the best of this month. Let's do this together. Amin :)

***********

How close are you with Him now ?

........

Adult dilemma.

Hello. Assalamualaikum.

Tick, tock, tick, tock. Time is moving soo fast! Another two weeks before my holidays really ends. Phew, after almost three months, it is so nice to think that I am going back to the campus life for good. Lately, A and I had a looong serious talk for almost everyday. You know, started from the random talks about friends, life experiences and inspirations, some politics issues, and the main subject matter that will never be forgotten (This topic is the hardest and the most painful to be talked to), what the future really hold for both of us.... 

"I am so stress with my work. I am thinking to further my studies. How's your day ?"

"Not good. I am stress too. I haven't decide where I want to go."

The growing up syndrome, may be ? Hehe. Ahhhh if only I know, growing up will be this hard... :( I guess we are really in crisis now. Both of us are in rush to settle everything in time in order to proceed to the next serious stage (Wuu). Well, the conversation will usually end up with one consoling another...... & the last message will be:

"Let's sleep, don't worry too much. We 'll continue tomorrow."

******HAHA******

But, seriiiouuuuslyyyyy life is riddled with a lot of tough questions mannnn! For everyone's information, I have secured my place in two universities for my degree program. & now, it is the time to only reply the offer (Which I haven't done it yet). I really don't want to think, but it just happened....... and pop! Makes me wondering a lot. May be the fault is on me, I am too immersed with the idea of achieving. We have to achieve this and that in order to achieve the highest dream of everyone -living the high life one day. 

Thinking of what Ustaz said in my tafsir class (We discussed about surah Al-Mulk last night), ..Yang menciptakan mati dan hidup, untuk menguji kamu, siapa yang diantara kamu yang lebih baik amalnya. Dan Dia Mahaperkasa Maha Pengampun (Al-Mulk:2). In this sentence, it tells that He is the one who created death & life in order to test us. And to be more exact, Allah will always tests us till the end of our lives and His tests will be in many ways, either through the hardships or by the ease-ness. The point here is we have to always do good deeds. & another thing to be highlighted, Allah urges us to do the best quality of amal. Ustaz repeated this many times in his talk: Allah uji kita dengan siapa yang lebih BAIK amalnya, bukan yang BANYAK amal. 

Hm. Subhanallah. I feel a lot better listening to the talk. Whenever we have conflict between our head and our heart, the only way out is only Allah. Only Him can take us through the storm. Well, logic thinking. Since He is the one who create the test, of course he will has the answer scheme. Am I right ? Hehe. Until I finish writing this entry, I am still not sure which offers I would like to accept. But, I know He will help me after this. Allah will never give his servants challenges without knowing their capabilities. I can survive! 

If you find yourself like me (In the crisis of adult dilemma), please noted that we are in the same boat. Let's take this opportunity to remain conscious of Allah all the time. May be before this, we always forget about Him. Perhaps ? 

Women are (n't) complicated

I have just finished reading a book and I am soooooo drowned into it nooow. Where She Went really got under my skin. This book turns out to a better book (Read: Incredible) compared to If I Stay. Well, just like Adam, knowing that both of them are no longer longer together (Mia dumped him without any hint of explaination) since the accident really makes me wondered. Why Mia why ?! 

"She kissed me good-bye. She told me that she loved me more than life itself. Then she stepped through security. She never came back." 

"Ever hear the one about that dog that spent it's life chasing cars and finally caught one - and had no idea what to do with it? I'm that dog."

Like him, I am angry too. Sometimes, I feel like I can feel everything what is he going through.. All things that he say, really breaks me :( Reading through the lines make me think a lot. How the power of love can destruct one self... And the worst is, how can Adam's story touches my heart more rather than the story of Mia losing her family.. They are amazing. Well, perhaps Adam's story is too bitter. And his emotions is too strong.... I can't help myself to feel upset at Mia.. how can she has the guts to leave Adam.. Hm, am I sobbing over a guys's broken heart now ? Haha

But, of course, the best part of this book is when Mia and Adam met again after being departed.. and start to talk about what really happened since three years ago. I really don't want to care on what Mia says. What I know is she really has no solid reasons to leave Adam. But, as I start to re-think again, the only thing that Adam do after he was left by Mia is only blaming her. And he takes a lot of anger out on others.. (I was influenced too. haha)... And you know, he even have another girlfriend after that too! Wow.

“It would ’ve been easier to die. It’s not that I want to be dead now. I don’t. I have a lot in my life that I get satisfaction from, that I love. But some days, especially in the beginning, it was so hard. And I couldn’t help but think that it would’ve been so much simpler to go with the rest of them. But you—you asked me to stay. You begged me to stay. You stood over me and you made a promise to me, as sacred as any vow.” 

"You talked to me, but you didn’t. I could see you having these two-sided conversations. The things you wanted to say to me. And the words that actually came out.”

When Mia finally tell him the reasons, I am quite stunned. I don't expect that it is also hard on her (Well, obviously she is the one who left. Why she should be sympathized ?). Ok, I 'm lying. If only I am Mia, I 'll do the same as her too. I guess. I don't mean to sound insensitive. But, I understand how Mia feel too. Sometimes we are too tired to explain things. Can't men just reflect & think what had they promise to us.. and what exactly had they done in order to fulfil all the promises ? Look, ok (Just now, I was on Adam's side. But now I am going to gang with Mia). Am I being complicated here ? Ah. My brain hurts now. Till then, take care guys. Haha

This is the real... reality

Assalamualaikum!

*This entry is pretty lengthy. Please bear with it*

I really want to blog since last two / three days ago. I am so excited! I haven't been to Islamic courses for a long time.. & When my Abah said that there is one tafsir class at the mosque nearby to my house.. No excuse to me this time! Hehe. We all need reminders.. to ensure we don't become so ensnared in this crazy world! It is so scary to think of, Masya Allah. 

I have always think Quran & us have a very special connection. It is just like we need sun to help us to see our way during the day. And I finally understand when Ustaz said this that night: Keperluan manusia terhadap Al-Quran lebih daripada keperluan ikan terhadap air. Allah always stresses us to think and to use our mind. You know, Quran is just like a love letter from Him, that is full of questions & answers.

Ustaz talked about the last part of Surah Al-Haqqah that night. I missed the first part of it. The second part was explained by Abah (He went to this class last week). Well, Al- Haqqah means The inevitable truth. Read: Reality. The reality is the inevitable event that will happen one day. What Abah always said to us... hari kehancuran ini ada dua, hancur maksudnya kiamat.. & juga mati. Mati juga umpama kiamat bagi kita.... Whether we realize or not, He always reminds us to be aware of the judgement day. Basically, the final part of this surah conclude everything that has been discussed in the early sections. Regarding Allah, his prophet, alam ghaib, & sam'iyyat things (syurga, neraka, hari kiamat etc etc).

My favourite Al-Quran

I am an old-style person (I guess). I love physical reading very much. If it has to be read, so I need books. Real books. Not from the handphone or what so ever. & when it comes to reading and learning, I have always need to jot down the important points (Or at least, things that I really think are very important to me). That is why, I still believe in the existence of notebook & planners. haha.

You know what Ustaz said that night ? Hak Al-Quran ke atas diri kita adalah kita mesti khatam sekurang-kurangnya dua kali setahun. Subhanallah, that is why Abah always forces us to read & read Al-Quran. Come on, we can go to work everyday, we can read hundred pages of novel, but to read a page of Al-Quran ? No ? 

*sigh* 

Listening to Ustaz's lecture really makes me think. I mean, we are just only normal human beings. We do a lot of mistakes. Sometimes, we try to hold our tongues, lower our gaze, or try as good as possible to avoid what Allah asks us to avoid.. but, we are normal human beings. We are weak and we can do the same mistakes over and over. But to know that Allah is always there for us, how can we never feel the shame ? No matter how bad we are, His door of forgiveness is always opens for us.

And, here we go for the most important notes that Ustaz said before he ended his lecture. If we have these four things with us, we have Islam in our hand. 

1) Zikr

2) Grateful body & soul

3) Sabr

4) Solehah wife / soleh husband

    
Another interesting point from Ustaz that makes me ponder: Innalillahiwainnailaihiroji'un. Kembali kepada Allah. Why we are busy to say that to the dead, whereby we should suppose to say that before we are really go back to Him. Pang! Slapped my face hardly! So, in whatever we do.. We have to always remember that there is another life in the hereafter. And that is the reality that all of us have to face. No one knows, when is the day. That is why, we are told to prepare for it. This is the real... reality.

I want to be better.

Step by step. Slowly.....

Home-work

There are few random thoughts running through my head these few days. It is quite challenging to put everything into words here. -Ah, some things are better left unsaid.. So, what's up ? I am totally fine (except for my face, there are little bumps here and there. & yes, I 'm stress with that T__T). After all, holiday mood is still on.... And oh I am not sure whether this is considered as good news or not, but I 've settled down for good. hehe, which means I have no official relationship with my campus anymore. Yeay ?! With the new team that has been set up for both of the club & students' council, I wish all of them best of luck to go through the craziness of workloads for the whole year. *evil laugh here*

I have just come home from my sister's convocation last week. It was fun... and full of sentimental value. Despite of some regrets in me for not being the first in the family to graduate.. I am soooo proud of my sister! You can never imagine on how hard she struggled during her school and uni - days in order to receive the scroll. Mendidik anak ibarat menanam pokok. Dulu, ditanam saja benih. Hari ini dah tiba masa kami tuai hasilnya. ....Abah and his lecture will never fall apart. He tazkirah us all the way from the campus back to Kelate -__-" But, yes they are all true. Looking at our parents (non-stop clicking his camera, make us embarrased in front of the friends bla bla. haha), they only want the best for us. And, I know this day will never possible without them. Well, now they can sigh a little bit of relief to see one of their children has pass very well (Many more to come!).

Hm, ajet sangat! #JelitadahKonvo

On the other note, my youngest brother (not so young anymore, he 'll be 15 next year. pffft) has getting more playful now! Besides of futsal and squash (his birds will never be forgotten), with this new globalization era of smartphones; he is very addicted to COC. Last few days, he was scolded by Abah for not doing anything sooo, now he behaved a bit and one day I came to see him doing his work quitely in his room.

A : Dik, why are you so lazy doing school works now ?

B : How can I not be lazy doing all these homeworks, teachers never ask for them to be pass up. To make it more worst ?! I am the only one who settled all of them.

A : ........Orang baik selalu teraniaya

*******

But, seriously who to blame now ?!!

Life just got real, sigh.

Assalamualaikum! 

Phew, finally! Guys, I am very panic! I can't access my blog since yesterday. I even think of probability that my blog was hacked T__T Ah, what to say. This place is one place that I treasure the most, how can it disappear just like that ? Without any single good bye ? Ok, Fety is being exaggerate, as always. haha

It has been two weeks. I have just come back from Jakarta & a commitment of work to my college last two days -they were the last one, since I 'm not joining my MPP team to Perth this December, and perhaps will not able to join the Mega PC Fair program also. Thinking of not going back there after this makes me cry inside (This time is serious. Even if I 'm going back there again, things will never as the same as today anymore). Well, life really has a way of kicking us when we are down (absolutely). And just when we think we cannot fall any lower, we get kicked again. Duh, when did life get so real ?? I cannot lie to myself. I am having a rough time now. Erm, may be we can say it as adult dilemma ? At times, I feel like I don't want to care about choosing. Let's go for alternatives, it is either do-or-die. Decision making process is never easy *sigh*. 

After all, I have always remind myself with this: Everyone has their own struggles. No matter what we are going through in our lives, other people also have gone the same or worse. It is times like this we need to be strong in order to come out stronger on the other side. Come on, I have passed series of tragedies before this, how can I not endure this little dilemma ? Hehe.

I think the biggest design project anyone can have is their own life

I am a person who likes to make 'things-to-do list' that can help me to organize my day. Alhamdulillah, many things can be settled by doing the list. Still there are some things are not going according to my plan (I am always in total mess when I am busy. haha). Sometimes, what we want and what we get in life are totally different.... I am an ordinary human, who is very immersed in designing the future and sometimes, totally forget on what has been said in Al-Quran, ....But, they plan, and Allah plans. And Allah is the best planner (Al-Anfal:30).  

Of course, this is a SPONSORED post. My best friend needs to pay me for letting his story comes out openly in my sketch place. haha. I was too busy with my own stuff this whole November. But, I guess I excel my first surprise present :) -I was attacked with a lot of screen-shots of this picture that day. Haha! & thank you for my busy-ness, I have no time to reply at all (I have nothing to reply, that is the truth! Haha). 

So, the long wait is over. All of your hard works and sleepless nights for the past few years have been paid off. Happy graduation to the one who is in love with design projects the most. Designing is always cool, but in the mean time, He too has already designed and planned our projects ahead. What more can we say except let's put the trust in Him ? Allah is the best planner.

Happy graduation. You owe me big this time!

Reflections: He is watching you

Assalamualaikum!

Wuu, I have been more frequent on the blog! *proud* Well, perhaps best friend is right. My life is starting to get back to normal. I can think more straight and do whatever I want now. After all, I can't tell you how much I enjoyed my this semester holiday. -I rarely have semester break since last year. Don't you think that I deserve this break ?!

Since I am at home, of course, on holiday mood; which means no books and no assignments to be done, sisters keep bashing on me to do all the house chores. Well, we have our own duties (The perk of having too many girls at home. haha) and it is normal routine for me everyday to do the laundry. There is no fun in doing all these house works, especially when you have to go back and forth outside your house. I mean, before going out you have to cover up.. you know.. And I was too lazy to do that one day. Ah, it was so hot outside and I don't think there will be people... So, I walked carefully (To make sure no one see me) before sister turned to me after a few more steps and asked "Dah banyak pahala ke buat harini ?"

Deep. Her words shake me up. Allah -the watchful. How can I forget this ayah: Allah is Ever-Watchful over all things. (al-Ahzab: 52). Clearly, Allah tells us that He watches over all of His servants. He even watches over all of their secrets and their deeds. Ah, I should more aware of Allah’s rights over me and of my duty towards Him. Astaghfirullah T__T

__________________________________________________________________________

Leadership is about taking responsibilities, not making excuses

I have just come back from a leadership course yesterday and I am slightly frustrated with some of the participants that suppose should join the camp but end up with absentees. No matter how logic all of the excuses, I still cannot brain them. Come on, at least do this for the sake of our friendship. 

I have been part of students' organizations since school and I can tell you that the amount of experience that I learnt is incredible. But, still I went to all the organized courses. In every courses, I met a lot of amazing people, I got mentors, and the most important, I learn to develop my personality. The leadership stuffs in university are far difference compared to the one that you learnt in school. So, what makes you think that you are good enough in leadership ? (Read: Fety is very disappointed)

What's wrong with you ?!

The only thing that makes me bored is hearing people say they are bored

Till today I love her the same ... not because I didn't find anyone else ... but because ... I don't have time left after loving her.. ..*Mohabbatein mood*. The weather is great, holiday is lovely, home- made food is always kind of thing. ahh. This is my second week of holiday and I 'm enjoying this to the fullest.

I don't know why people complain that their holidays are boring. Are they really have nothing to do at home ? I have always got things to do (washing all the dishes, laudry everyday, bla bla except cooking). Everytime I hear people say that ....my holiday is boring.. I really want to reply back, what's wrong with you ha?! Holiday doesn't mean that you have to go for a vacation. Come on, resting at home also means a lot especially at our age now. There is no much time for us after this -If you know what I mean here. hihi

______________________________________________________

Al- Baqarah. The Cow.

The peak of Quran, Al- Baqarah. Abah keeps remind us to recite this surah. Bukan Abah paksa, tapi cuba lah.. Bukan untuk Abah, untuk awak sendiri juga... Well,  everyday he 'll randomly asked ...dah baca quran ? When we busy downloading latest episode of Running Man, he 'll come and ask ...dah berapa ayat harini hafal ? (Apa nak jawab ? Haha) & he even hinted for anyone who can recite for at least 50 ayat(s) of Al- Baqarah, he 'll give reward. Adoi can't run la like this. Little brother & sister have started for 20 verses. Me ? Still crawling for first ten verses. So hard!

Last semester, I thought Law is tough, but this one is even tougher. In order to ease my work, I tried to google for some information(s) and lessons about this surah. What I know is this surah is named after the story of golden for worship by Bani Israel in the absence of Nabi Musa a.s. I 'm very glad that I took Arabic during my high school and for third language in uni, thus I can understand a little bit what does the words mean. 

You can try google them too. There are a lot. To copy them, I think it 's not appropriate. Perhaps, I 'll write it soon if I have extra time but for now, I have to make my own revision first (See, there comes a work again. How can I say my holiday is boring?!). 

Oh, by the way to google, please write the key word Al- Baqarah. Do not translate it into The Cow, or.... Lembu... I afraid that you 'll find something else, which is of course is more interesting (duniaaaaaa) than Al- Baqarah. haha

Rise up and be thankful

Assalamualaikum. 

The result(s) are out. Yes, both of the GE and exam results. hihi. Well, GE result is sensitive. I really don't want to talk about it. As my best friend said once, people see what they want to see. And here, I would like to add one quote from another friend: which I think, very true! The problem with the world today is that intelligent people are full of doubts whereas the stupid ones are full of confidence -share itu, share ini. Yang menang pun masalah, yang kalah... Lagi lah kan.. 

Meanwhile, examination result is more to happy news for me. After slightly a month sitting for my final examination last semester, I have just gotten my result last week and I am very pleased with the result. :) Managed to maintain the GPA of second semester and of course, the pressure is getting higher after this... 

"..Demi sesungguhnya! Jika kamu bersyukur nescaya Aku akan tambahi nikmat Ku kepada kamu dan demi sesungguhnya, jika kamu kufur ingkar sesungguhnya azab Ku amat lah keras." (14 : 7) 

After all the up(s) and down(s), I believe that the simplest lesson in life we can learn is to be thankful for what we have already received. When I texted Abah, telling him about my result.. he replied: "Jika kamu bersyukur, pasti Aku tambahkan lagi..." ......Thus, what to reply back.... ? Nak minta hadiah pun dah terbantut, haha.

Alhamdulillah. I am very grateful with both of my parents who raised me up well and all the individuals that I have met along the way, you absolutely changed my view of life. Thank you guys.

Real Madrid vs Dortmound (?)

It's 4.30 a.m. :)

It is so quiet in here.

I don't always stay up late. But tonight, there is an important game between Real Madrid and Dortmound. How can I miss this! haha. No, I 'm not a big fan of football. I just love it. But that doesn't mean I 'll stay up every time there is football game. Kalau rasa nak tengok, bangun lah. Kalau tak, tidur sampai subuh. :)

Regarding the game, Real Madrid fail to win in the aggregate despite of their impressive finish to the game. The game ended up as 2-0 for Real Madrid but they lost out with Dortmund with 4-3 on aggregate. huhu. After all, a big respect to Madrid. I guess Dortmound has the good luck on their side more than Real Madrid tonight.

__________________________________________________

Update:

Qiamullail is a way of getting close to Allah. The benefits are too much. Night prayer is ssuperior to day prayer. To be close to Allah s.w.t is incomparable.. Reminding myself of the importance of the night prayers. When was the last time I did the Qiamullail ? I 'm not sure; but for this year..... well, may be tonight is the second or third time (teruk kan). Personally, I think it is a bit difficult to do it with others. I prefer to do it alone because as for me, night prayer is a private pray.

Abah used to wake us up especially during the last 10 days of Ramadhan to join him prays. It was like a training. Once it becomes a habit, it 'll become our culture. As the word goes, alah biasa, tegal biasa. To others who may think it is a bit difficult to do it individually, try to participate in group prayers; with the members of the family is the best choice. 

Some people understood that qiamullail is one or two hours of solat. Well, I used to think like that too. The truth is it does not entail a specific number of rakaat which must be performed. Oh come on, just start with two rakaat(s) of Tahajjud and then, slowly add more. The main problem now is to wake up, and get ready to pray. It 's hard man. I 'm also struggling to do this, but let's try! ;)

Spend the day laughing. We had fun. :)

Thank you, friends. 
For being my rock, thank you.

Me love yuols! 

_______________________________________________________

 Ya Allah! Ingatkanlah aku selalu 

Mencari Harta Qarun – Kenapa Qarun? Siapakah Qarun? Dalam sejarah Islam – Qarun ialah salah seorang dari pembesar di zaman Firaun dan beliau tersangatlah kaya. 

Abah opened up this topic just now. "I have only been given it because of knowledge I have..." (Quran, 28: 78). Phew, itu lah kata yang diucap Qarun. His arrogance brought him nothing but harm. He was so ungrateful to Allah, and arrogantly believed that all his possessions were earned semata- mata because of his hard work. Jangan anggap semua barang yang kita punya hari ini milik kita, semua ini amanah Allah. That is what Abah always reminds us. Insya Allah Insya Allah. :) Indeed, we have to always remember that Allah does not look at our forms and possessions, but He looks at our hearts and our deeds. 

Pimpinlah aku selalu Tuhan,

Apabila aku beramal terjauh dari riyak dan megah

Pimpinlah aku selalu Tuhan,

Bila dipuji hatiku menolak 

Jika aku dikeji itu memanglah bagiku layak

-Abuya Ashaari Muhammad At Tamimi.

Demi masa.

The majority of mankind do not appreciate these two blessings: good health and free time

Subhanallah. Demi masa, sesungguhnya manusia itu dalam kerugian. I am super busy recently. No weekends since last two weeks for me. Well, too bad to complain. During these few days, I learned something. I thought that I have worked hard for my entire work and I feel that I am a very busy person. In fact, there are other people who are busier than me. Thus, I cannot really complain about my busy hours since I actually have more free time. Let's enjoy every single items in our life.

There are at least one quiz, two extra classes of taekwondo practice, and some extra club works to be done next week. Once you get so busy and hectic, you are actually in a process of learning to manage your time effectively. I read this on the internet. Somehow, I remembered once my lecturer said that the busier you are, the more effective that your work will be. Hmm. I Allah, 'll update this entry again. For the time being, let's stop here first! 

_______________________________________________________

Update:

Source: Islamic Gleams, Facebook

Note to self. My sister shared this on her facebook. Probably to remind herself, me, and everyone! Let's focus on point five: Pray Istikharah before any decision. :)

Dari Jabir ra., ia berkata: “Nabi pernah mengajarkan kepada kami Istikharah dalam berbagai urusan, seperti mengajarkan sebuah surah dalam Al Quran" (Copied somewhere from internet, me too just know about this!). Ya, bila di sebut sahaja Solat Istikharah kebanyakan di kalangan kita hanya terbayangkan ketika hendak memilih jodoh. Saya juga fikir begitu! hihi. But, Abah told me once, Istikharah should be done everyday.. Skopnya luas. Setiap hari, kita juga berperang dengan pelbagai pilihan. Subhanallah. 

You stuck in some sort of situations
You have questions in your head, but 
you might feel too embarassed to ask

Allah taala adalah tempat berbincang dan tempat mengadu. Semua perkara, tidak kira besar mahupun kecil, penting atau remeh, semuanya wajar diserahkan kepada Allah s.w.t. Hanya Dia yang terbaik dalam menentukan hala tuju kita. Justeru, ayuh kita mencuba, ubah persepsi asal tentang Istikharah! Alah bisa, tegal biasa. ;D

Mum's List, St John Greene

A declaration of undying love, of 'infinity acres and acres'

Quick update:

I know nothing about this book when I picked it up. I was moved by the title.. A true warm story of family's survival through the horror of cancer. Kate knew that she would be leaving her boys soon (Reef & Finn, and her loving husband, Singe). That is why, over her last few days, Kate created what so called the Mum's List. The couple talked and cried together as she wrote her thoughts down. The last thing that she wrote in her list was: find a woman to settle down with so the boys can have a female influence and stability in their lives.. I don't know whether I 'm strong enough to tell this to my love one day.. Even to write it.. I don't think I can afford. :)

Apart from that, I respect Singe for being so strong to write his story, as a tribute to Kate and the wonderful life that both of them shared (I am looking forward to write mine too, one day! I Allah, Amin Amin).. I love Singe's words on how he described his soul mate from the day he met her. Couldn't agree more, I was so drawn into the Singe's personal story. This book is highly recommended. Go and read one, everyone!

___________________________________________________

It is the duty of everyone to keep his Iman in check. In this case, I do have problem. Once I have skipped doing one action for one day, it is quite difficult for me to continue it again. In the end, I 'll skip for several days before resuming the action back. Manusia kan ada angin. So berangin. Despite reading all story books, lovey dovey fairy tales, I determine to finish up reciting the Ibu Segala Buku  (you-know-well) within these five weeks. Doa- doakan, mudahan tak lalai. Angin baik sepanjang minggu. huhu.

Even if I wanted to be friendly, the last thing I will do is to talk politics

Yes, as we grow older,  we tend to become increasingly convinced of ourselves and the opinions that we hold. Well, we all think differently. I wish people would not fight over it. Talking too much bla bla bla, copy and paste-ing all the (can't spit out this. 'll be an issue here. huhu). Still after all, we could not voting this year. The time will come when we have to decide what we believe. Be patient.

#Salam Syawal

We encounter thousands of people, who have the ability to change our perspective of life

Well, I never got to understand the complete story of my Tok Ayah, the hardships that he faced during his young-hood, in the mean time trying to raise a large family. However, I remember a nice man that loved to laugh.. Tok Ayah.. :) Being as one of the closest person to him, make me realized that though he was gone physically, he would never spiritually gone. Still remain in my heart, and the past memories of him would always stay with us. -Even though nobody lives forever, their legacy will always remain. Al- Fatihah

The last picture, eid- ul adha 1431 H

_______________________________________________________

Kita semua hebat kerana hati terpanggil untuk menghulurkan sesuatu buat insan yang kita sayang

Hai orang-orang yang beriman, janganlah kamu menghilangkan pahala sedekahmu dengan menyebut-nyebutnya dan menyakiti (perasaan si penerima), seperti orang yang menafkahkan hartanya kerana riya' kepada manusia, dan dia tidak beriman kepada Allah dan hari Kemudian. Maka perumpamaan orang itu seperti batu licin yang di atasnya ada tanah, kemudian batu itu ditimpa hujan lebat, lalu jadilah dia bersih (tidak bertanah). Mereka tidak menguasai sesuatu pun dari apa yang mereka usahakan, dan Allah tidak memberi petunjuk kepada orang-orang yang kafir. (Al- Baqarah, 262-264) #Subhanallah

You are on the top of my to do list

Hello hello everyone, sorry for the lack of update. It is holiday season! Aah a long weekend ahead and yeah, the perfect time to meet up some old friends and family. For many reasons, many of us find ourselves alone for this holiday. Yea, not all of us are having semester break. In fact, only the UiTM foundation students (One-year programme) are enjoying their holidays. Hihi.

Er. The holidays can be very boring, even for those of us who are usually okay being on our own. Kan? But, actually there are a lot of things that we can do during this long weekend, in order to make the holiday less lonely when we are alone. As for me, I have prepared something, just like a check list, that may be I can do (suppose to be, should do) this holiday. But, until today, only one had been done. Haha. Teruk kan? -___-

___________________________________________________

Things that is meant to be, of course 'll be

For new morning with its light,

For rest and shelter of the night,

For health, food, for love and friends,

For everything, say thank you, thank you

Kehidupan ini hanya lah sesuap nasi dan seteguk air. Ada pun selebihnya adalah suatu kelebihan yang tidak terlalu diperlukan. Justeru, nikmati lah apa yang anda miliki saat ini. Dan, bersyukur lah. Untuk setiap anugerah yang diberikan.

A Walk To Remember

Jamie: You have to promise you won't fall in love with me.

Landon: That's not a problem.

search: google

Those who may be different from us can be the most wonderful people to know

This is a 2002 movie. I have seen this movie once and I am obsessed with Jamie and Landon! In fact, I am watching it right now. :) It is a beautiful and heart warming story that will sure to leave you crying at the end.

Landon, the hot bad boy spends most of his time partying with his friends. Jamie helps him to transform from a selfish to a young matured adult. He learns about love and faith and how to forgive, while his love blossoms for Jamie (How I wish to be the Jamie too!). In the end of the story, Landon realizes what love is and what it really means to love another.

The time and tears spent on this movie was well worth! :)

_____________________________________________________

"I wish you could do this, I wish you could do that"

Some people don't want to change,

some people might have something they can't change.

You can’t change someone else, but you can change yourself. The more you give, the more you are likely to receive. Relationships take a lot of work. Giving your partner the things you wish he gives you may can inspire him to give back to you. Treat people the way you would like people to treat you, then you 'll really enjoy the life!

Gulliver's Travels

Randomly picked a movie today. Gulliver's Travels. It is all about a wannabe writer who takes an assignment in Bermuda in order to impress his boss but ends up on an island where he meets the tiny citizen. Well, the movie was part silly. But yea, entirely interesting. Solid fun!

Whenever you do a thing, act as if all the world is watching

Oh, everyone has different ideas of what is normal when wandering about in public places. Haih. As the case last morning, just started the movie, the drama behind too follow the flow. Aah. So how? Be considerate of them? Give people their personal space? O okey. I know, but why in here? Is this the way to behave in public places? Get a room please.

Make sure that your happiness is not disturbing other's happiness. Hey people, try to avoid being in annoying ways. Er. Can you please try to behave at least, as if your mother are watching?

Receiving something with love.

I can never thank you enough, but I will try.

Thanks a million

Is there a better thing than receiving something with love?

Thank you is a simple phrase which is so common that we have taken for granted. Sometimes people think that it is just an unimportant small thing. So, we can choose whether to say it or not. Yes, many of us forget about this. Even me too! (:

Thank you means everything.
Being thankful is a simple thing.
It has great effect to someone's life.

I am trying to become more conscious when I can say thank you. I want everyone who ever do something to me know how much I appreciate it. Whether I send out thank you cards, say it to their face, call, or even via short message, I want they know that I am very pleased with them.

Thank you for your gift of love.

It just make sense to me. Thank you.

So, people! Look around and maybe, you 'll notice that there is indeed someone who has been spare their time to be with you. Say thank you to them! :)

It is not a big thing if you leave me now

I'm a big big girl

In a big big world

Yes, I'm lying. The loss of relationship can bring on heartache. It can be rough, no matter what, no one really wants to go through them. How can I let go, someone that I love?

I don't know how to speak for anyone but myself.

I know that somewhere in the future everyone will leave. The thing is that I can't imagine the world without the person that I love. I realize how much it'll hurt when they are gone. I just started to think how much I would hurt and how meaningless my life would be without them.

Nikmat, dugaan Allah.

Satu ujian, satu anugerah.

Ujian mendatang selalunya menjadikan diri kita lebih tegar. Masakan tidak, ia mengajar kita untuk menjadi lebih lasak dalam menggalas setiap beban kehidupan. Andai tidak mampu bertahan pada ujian yang awal, mungkin sahaja, peringkat seterusnya kita rebah.

Lain manusia, lain yang ditanggungnya.